How to Talk to Mum or Dad About Needing Help: A Guide for Families

Starting a conversation with a parent about needing extra support at home can be emotional and difficult. You want to keep them safe and happy—while also respecting their independence. Here are some gentle, practical ways to approach the conversation with care and confidence.

1. Start with Empathy, Not Instruction

Instead of saying, “You can’t manage on your own anymore,” try:

“I’ve noticed you’ve been finding a few things harder lately—how are you feeling about that?”

Use “I” statements and focus on their feelings, not just your concerns. Let them know you’re on their side.

2. Use Real-Life Examples

Bring up specific, recent moments to gently highlight areas where help could make a difference:

• “You seemed really tired after your appointment—would it help to have someone go with you next time?”
• “I noticed the laundry piling up—maybe there’s a way to make things easier.”

Examples help avoid generalisations and show you’re being observant and thoughtful.

3. Reframe Care as Independence, Not Dependence

It’s not about losing control—it’s about keeping it. Try saying:

“Having a bit of help at home might give you more time and energy for the things you enjoy.” “Someone could support you with the heavy lifting, so you can keep your routine.”

Care can be empowering—not limiting.

4. Involve Mum or Dad in the Process

Include them in decisions and make it feel like a partnership:

“Would you be open to just meeting someone for a cup of tea and a chat? No pressure.”

“We can try support with just one thing—like shopping or cleaning—and see how it feels.”

Start small, give them choices, and go at their pace.

5. Be Patient and Revisit the Conversation

They might need time to think it through—and that’s okay. Leave a leaflet or article around, and check in later:

“Let’s keep talking about it—I want you to feel good about any decision we make.”

You don’t need to convince them in one conversation.

Final Thought:

Sometimes hearing from someone else helps. Their GP, a trusted friend, or even their hairdresser may help reinforce the message. Above all—approach the subject with love, understanding, and patience.

Need more support? Our friendly team is here to help you navigate options for care at home. Call us or pop in for a chat—we’re here when you’re ready.

Able Living Care Services Ltd
Compassionate Care at Home in Poynton, Bramhall & Hazel Grove
Call: 01625 875865 | Email: info@ablelivingcare.co.uk